Good City Haller, Bad Developer, Ugly Councillor

Post by Glissando Remmy in

44 comments

mysteryman.jpgGlissando Remmy remains an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, surrounded by mystery

Editor's Note: If you've been a regular reader of CityCaucus.com over the years, you already know that our creative and witty commentors are a big reason why so many people tune in each day. One of our more provocative and popular contributors to the comments section is someone that goes by the nom de plume "Glissando Remmy". I don't know who he/she is (really!), but I've been intrigued and amused by their numerous entries on this blog.

Last week Glissando approached me and asked if he/she could post on CityCaucus.com. Although I had some hesitation due to their anonymity, I decided to give it a try.

Here is the first official post. I hope you enjoy it!

++++ 

The Thought Of The Day

“I understand people's urge for more exposure, and height and density, but what's with ... the Donkey Suit?"

The Councillor sits inside, in the front, because he likes to commandeer, he's talking a lot, yet he doesn't know where he's going.

The City Haller sits in the back, he pretends to listen, but is facing the other way because he needs the air. A funny looking duo.

But here's the punch line... The Developer... is riding them both! The Donkey Suit... that's your Vancouver! It's worn out at the seams, the hoofs are almost gone, neither ear is pointing up, it doesn't even look like a suit any more, a Mexican blanket thrown over a pile of seedless watermelons, it's more like it.

Our three caballeros? Riding and hoofing absent minded into the sun, on the road... to nowhere.

There. Presented in Technicolor, the past and present development & planning process and leadership, 'riding' out of the City Hall these days.

This City Council and Mayor wouldn't be sitting for two days in a row to listen to grievances from hundreds of Vancouver citizens, if the above wasn't true.

For the past three years, this council have sent their message to each and every neighbourhood, sound and clear: “You are going to raise chicken, tend to bees, make your own loves, grow your own vegetables and bike to work. We'll meter your water, we'll portion your air and we'll later explain to you what's with the newest carbon offset footwear. Buy organic, stay natural, have a free-run spirit, but stay in range so we could keep an eye on you.”

It shouldn't be this way though.

Start with a neighbourhood pocket. Meet with the people. Listen to what they have to say. See what they want for their community. Enquire about their future needs. Explain the alternatives. Offer them your professional advice. Ask them for input and respect their ideas and creativity. Take it to The Developer and show it to The Councillor. And last but not least... listen to them.

This should be your City Haller.

Build what is needed not what is most profitable. You'll make money, don't worry! As some businesses with repeat customers would tell you, that is a proven strategy. Be fair, be involved and stop pushing contribution envelopes. Sooner or later, all those bad promissory notes are going to bite you... Walk, not ride the Donkey! And last but not least... listen to them.

This should be your Developer.

Stop mingling in The City Haller's affairs. Stop giving advice when you have no advice to give. Stop accepting envelopes stuffed with promissory notes from The Developer. Stop pretending you know where you're going. You should be the 'glue' and the 'maitre'd', the 'facilitator'. And last but not least... listen to them.

This should be your Councillor.

As for the Donkey Suit, it's only a Donkey Suit. It's been used as such for generations, and will be used as such for generations to come. The question is, who is going to wear the suit? Are they going to own the suit, is it going to be a rental, or is it going to be a 'free spirit' as it should be?

Planning, developing and leading a city, any city, should start with the Donkey Suit. Anything else are simply inconveniences, nuances and distractions. There would be no need for marathon meetings if the planning would always start with... “the people the Donkey Suit is made of”.

We live in Vancouver and this keeps us busy.

- Post by Glissando Remmy. You can follow Glissando on Twitter @GlissandoRemmy. You can also follow us on Twitter @CityCaucus.

44 Comments

Glissando... this is bliss...

;-)

I've always thought the Vancouver civics dialogue needed more poetry.

Interesting that anonymity is ok here when I was told it was not.

Fab Glissy!

and that boohoo is what makes it so delicious... only you or Chris will complain... we've grown to love Glissando.. just the way he/she is...for the truth that comes forth not by the handle he/she goes by... we have no need to information mine here...

Brilliant! Thank you Glissando.

anonymity is more than OK when it is used appropriately. Glissando is never anything but respectful and appropriate so BRING IT ON!

"only you or Chris will complain"

Sort of resigned to the double standard of this self-proclaimed 'media outlet' actually.

When there's two sets of rules, one for those you agree with, and another for those who challenge your ideas, you're not looking for truth, you're after power. In the long run, City Caucus just shot themselves in the foot IMO.

found this article that you all might find interesting.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-14312047

and the bully (Chris) speaks...

here is the deal Chris..anyone with a basic intelligence knows, that if you really need to have this dispute...get a lawyer and go to court ...demand to have this man's anonymity unmasked...force CC to expose him...

then you can honestly feel you've earned those perks for your home boyz...

but what if behind that mask is a big old snake with brown envelopes that bite you?

TROLL ALERT!!

George,

What?

Perhaps it's the irritating nature of your moniker....

Again we have Chris and Boohoo trying to take the conversation away from Glissando's most appropriate post...

For anyone that was at or watched last night's council meeting...I advise everyone to either attend or watch tonight...

Council has some explaining to do after last night, when several citizen's noticed some odd things and misinformation on City web sites ...

What is the developer community hiding...

Thanks Glissando... and loved your links last night on twitter...

The Thought of The Day

"Three things I want to say in a boat...(to say nothing of the dog)"

1. Daniel, psst, Daniel, ahem, I think you misplaced my comment. Now could we have a real Happy Face here --> :-) ? See, see what I mean?

2. This post sucks. Who wrote this? Do people in our days read Aesopian crap like this? Wasn't supposed Ballem to put a gag order on fables by now?

3. It wasn't me. I didn't write any of it. It was dictated to me...
By them:

'Andrea, Ballem, Chow, Dale, Ellen, Fabio The 'I Can't Believe It's Us In Office' Guy, Geoff, Heinrich, I, Jang, K, Louie, Magee, N, O, P, Q, Renewal, Solomon, Tim, U, Vision, XRatedPolitics, Y, W, Z.
(I think they are going for the full Alphabet City Hall Plantation in there, but don't quote me on that)
... thanks for the memories and for the inspiration guys! Like it or not, you'll have to COPE with it.

To the rest of the readers, to Daniel and Mike & City Caucus, thank you!
And I'll say this, you don't have to agree with me, or like me, or put up with me... I'm no Vision.
If you catch my drift.

We live in Vancouver and this keeps us busy.

PS.

This is too funny! What was the chance, one in a million?... for CC to choose that photo, as I have an identical one of myself, shot in the WestEnd approx. 10 years ago,and yes, it was part of a photographic exhibition...

"Again we have Chris and Boohoo trying to take the conversation away from Glissando's most appropriate post..."

No George, I do want to talk about this post. Appropriate is not the word I would use however given the previously mentioned policy on City Caucus. But because he/she/it speaks your kind of 'truth', it's ok. I find that troubling.

That is a great Editorial Comment. It tends to take some the air out of Vision's balloon. But should we expect more of the Visionistas, or after a review of their working backgrounds, why would we expect them to have planning abilities? They, including the Mayor are well over their heads in these rolls. There is no quick fix for their deficiencies.

Well I guess the joke is on you boohoo...hahahahah

We all knew this was coming... and the entertainment value that both you and Chris have offered up is priceless..

@ Boohoo - To be fair, GR did approach CC (not the other way around) and Daniel had some hesitation prior to posting. I don’t think policies are ever intended to be written in stone – heck, laws of the land evolve – so I don’t think it high handed or unfair for CC to rethink theirs. If you want to post something as “Boohoo”, I would suggest following the same path as Mr. Remmy and see what happens…the door may be slightly ajar….

Paul,

You are quite right. Following a number of requests that I received through Email, from people who are regular readers of many blogs, not only CC, and who KNOW ME... I have approached Daniel, through Email on Tuesday night asking him if he would accept a written piece from me...under one condition...I will remain 'Glissando Remmy'!

Wednesday morning I got OK-ed to submit anything I wanted on any subject related to urban living and/ or politics.
I wrote the above fable, I taught her how to flip its wings and by midday I open the window and let it fly away.
No timeline, no idea what would happen next.

Imagine my surprise when I found out late last night from Twitter that it was going to come out today.
I was as startled as anyone.
Anyhoo.
I hope you liked it, I hope it made sense to you, and I hope you found it relevant.
I may not be the easiest writer to read around the dining table, but I assure you there is always double meaning in most I say. You just have to look for it.
As they say in retail, two for the price of one!

GR-eetings!

Glissy you have a great sense of humor and an eloquent way of expressing yourself. You also seem to avoid the soap operas that some here seem to love.

As a person who works within the development industry I offer a few observations on the state of developers relations with the C of V. (these are from my own dealings and not meant in any way to reflect the views of others). The city planners and zoning departments are in complete duck & cover mode. The chances of passing any of these employees in the hallway without their ever present garbage can covering their a__es is slim at best. This administration has stopped the development community from doing business with the C of V in many regards. I know the group I work with is focusing on other opportunities in other municipalities due to the confusion that is rampant at 12th & Cambie. The level of cooperation we used to get from city staffers has evaporated like a happy planet juice box left in the desert for a week. Remember we pay taxes on our business, the city only spends them with little regard for the future of those tax dollars.

The difference between Glissando and Boohoo is that Glissando has established himself/herself as fair, ethical and credible.

Writing under an alias is not a new concept.

Dear City Caucus,
I cannot believe my eyes.
Glissando Remmy in print in your house! You made my day.
I cannot thank you enough.
For having to "listen" to Glissando speaking to us from the podium is a privilege. What a good call on your part.
Glissando, my son, you're my wife's first choice, and I approve of, he, he...
You ask "Do people in our days read Aesopian crap like this?" Yes they do! And if this is crap, it is the most beautiful I ever come across. Keep 'em coming.
Dr. Richard Unger MD (ret)

Loved it! And the surprise I've got...priceless. Citycaucus, hats off to you.
Glissy, I read your editorial twice, and aaah, it is clever. You are clever. The irony is there all right. The points you're making are so valid and current (what a read, during the allowed five minutes today at the city hall, this would be!)that no Vision hack could argue it without ridiculing himself/ herself.
This takes lots of skill on your part not that there is a need for me to mention that to you. I loved it.
Good City Haller, Bad Developer, Ugly Councillor, Donkey suit...my goodness how do you come up with all this? Wow and wow.

LOL!

I knew that I was going to forget to say something. When are we going to find out more about you?
I don't know about the others, but me...I'm dying to meet you!

boohoo
I'm sorry you find this troubling, but lets face it, yesterday you cringed..so troubled is a good thing ..

Lots of fun, but things were a lot worse under Sam Sullivan. These trends are all deep rooted and it will take a reinvention of how we think about our city and how we live in it to have real change. And I haven't seen any evidence that the NPA is in favor of doing better for the city. They support more mega projects and casinos, they seem to oppose transit options and would like to keep us in cars, and are clueless about the innovation economy. "As for the Donkey Suit, it's only a Donkey Suit. It's been used as such for generations, and will be used as such for generations to come. The question is, who is going to wear the suit?"

Hear, hear Steven
City Caucus brought in outside help. Vision Rules, glissando rhymes bayby!

OMG!!!!
My wish came true, thank you City Caucus.
Gliss, I liked it so much I am going to start a print out collection. my favorite part? ALL OF IT!
Vision Vancouver watch out! There is a new cowboy in town... and it is not your boy! Ta da

Not fair Stevo,
Why didn't you copy and paste the whole passage? Like so:
"As for the Donkey Suit, it's only a Donkey Suit. It's been used as such for generations, and will be used as such for generations to come. The question is, who is going to wear the suit?..... Are they going to own the suit, is it going to be a rental, or is it going to be a 'free spirit' as it should be?"
I think the key is in the words "own, rent and/or free spirit"
The paragraph that talks for itself and you avoided it is this IMO of course:
"For the past three years, this council have sent their message to each and every neighbourhood, sound and clear: “You are going to raise chicken, tend to bees, make your own loves, grow your own vegetables and bike to work. We'll meter your water, we'll portion your air and we'll later explain to you what's with the newest carbon offset footwear. Buy organic, stay natural, have a free-run spirit, but stay in range so we could keep an eye on you.”"

Nothing I could possibly add to that dear Stevo, nothing.
ta da

"here is the deal Chris..anyone with a basic intelligence knows, that if you really need to have this dispute...get a lawyer and go to court ...demand to have this man's anonymity unmasked...force CC to expose him"

Actually George. I have no problem with Mr. Remmy posting under any nom de plume he chooses. I do find City Caucus' flip-flop on anonymity kind of interesting however, even more so when they have banned at least one anonymous poster that had the annoying tendency to disagree with them. That runs against the spirit of their site's general rules IMO, and certainly isn't the type of behaviour one expects from a 'media outlet'.

@ Glissy,

I love the line "that you didn't write it". Yes, it writes itself, with the pols in this town.

Very "Lady Oracle" of you, mon ami.

I have to say that it surprised me at start, when I read the editorial. i thought it was a CityCaucus prank on Glissy... until this comment. Good one.
Glissy, your editorial is bang on, I enjoyed it very much. Good call, BTW is that meeting at the City Hall still going on?
to continue. To write the ed.op is one thing, I already knew you can do it, but to follow up with this comment is so classy of you, (Angry Tax Payer said it best) You're a great bro Glissando!

Oh. I see ChrisK, boohoo, and one pathetic looser calling himself GoVisionGo ran out of steam in here. terrific!

Glissando,

I think you have uncovered the real identity of boohoo. Have you noticed that not once in all his comments on City Caucus has he criticized the Mayor and his staff? Has he ever said anything nice to you Glissando? I think he is an inside worker in City Hall monitoring these sites for Vision. It wouldn't surprise me in the least that Mayor Robertson would pay someone with City funds to protect his image. This requires further investigating, but I just happen to know a few people who work for the City :). Of course boohoo can always stop hiding behind his name and tell us who he is... Keep us the great work Glissando - you should run for Mayor - I know many who would support you.

Kas,

sigh... Your inability to read and/or understand the words in front of you makes you look pretty silly.

Also, you think I'm some vision spy hiding behind anonymity while in the very same paragraph you tell GR he/she/it should run for mayor. GR is anonymous!

lol hypocricy gone crazy--thanks for the laugh before the long weekend!

Anonymity doesn't matter when what you arre saying makes sense (you boohoo, don't), is respectful and speaks the truth, not necessarily the 'government approved' one. Glissando is IMO all of the above, that's why I read him and never made a complain. Not only that he entertains us but tells the same story that the MSM sholud be telling and they don't. Frances Bula could teach 'GlissandoRemmy' at her gig at Langara. He is that good! A modern day storyteller of the news. Glissando, I loved your story. Great ending... “the people the Donkey Suit is made of” was a stroke of genius. Thanks!

"Anonymity doesn't matter when what you arre saying makes sense (you boohoo, don't), is respectful and speaks the truth, not necessarily the 'government approved' one."

'The truth'. As though there is only one and his/hers/its is it. lol.

I don't know what you're implying by 'government approved'.

Glissando Remmy,
I absolutely loved your post! I usually do not comment on blogs, but this one is worthy of my time.
Thanks for a good reading. As if I went to the library to pick up a good novel for the weekend and I stumbled upon a book club. Very thoughtful comments as well. Done and out! Great long weekend everyone!

boohoo, face it...some of us are not articulate or creative. You and I can try our best but we will never convey our thoughts or ideas like Glissy.

Hopefully you will recover from this painful dose of reality.

Julia,

Again, you leave me laughing!

Regardless of the 'boohoo' trolls n the comment section, the satire in this editorial is too well defined to debate. Great read. Will come back again.
What a visual treat, the three culprits around a donkey suit... LMAO
Thanks.
For CityCaucus, one mentioning:
none of the links in here (You can follow Glissando on Twitter @GlissandoRemmy. You can also follow us on Twitter @CityCaucus.) are active!
Thanks!

Aesopian crap!!!

Glissando, you have broken my heart(:

It's as relevant today as it was many.many eons ago.

I have a children's version that I can send to people who don't understand the underlying premises.

Keep on, keep on.

Chris(one of many)
Re:
"Aesopian crap!!!
Glissando, you have broken my heart(:"
...
You understand that I was making fun of...myself and not Aesop, right? I used it as a simile. Aesop, and later the French fabulist Jean de La Fontaine, and British satirist Johnathan Swift were all great judges of character and able to make very fine observations on human behavior. My heroes too!
Just wait...

Talking horses would be more preferable than the bureaucrats I have encountered.

It has been a long,long week.

Glissy,
my respects man! I was away for a week plus the long weekend and I passed over your post. Just great! Please keep up the good work. I am looking forward to the next one...!

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